Rich’s Blog de Sexy

So, I’ve finally decided to get out of my handsomely overweight and single phase, and move onto phase…like…20 of my life. I’m gonna call it the “handsomely NOT SO overweight, and MARRIED phase.” This is the part of my life, where I decide that I’m going to settle down with Angela. Due to this upcoming “Marriage” (September 20th) I now feel the need to make myself smaller. Sure, sure, it was ok for the drinking pictures, and the camping pictures, to be a bigger fella. But on my wedding, our bridal, and groom parties are going to be very good looking people. VERY good looking. Granted, I know it seems egotistical, even superficial, but I’m being honest. Let me explain. All of my friends, are good looking people. Well…most of them, but they’re all in better shape than I am. Which, all in all, doesn’t take much effor….ok, let me rephrase that again, it doesn’t take ANY effort. So I’ve decied to document my newfound efforts to change my body type from ‘morbidly obese’ right down to ’sanely hefty.’

Oh yeah…

I got about 6 months to do it in. So, I’ll be honest on my blog, and keep…myself and the other 2 readers up to date with my assumed weight loss. Because I don’t feel like trying to search for a scale to weigh myself on. And trust me, it’d be a hell of a search. This started about a week ago. That’s when we set the date, and the diet. I’m sure Angela will have NO problem dropping the weight. She has incredible will power when she wants to. But me…let’s just say will power’s not my strong suit. I mean, I’ve already found myself verbally shouting “ooh” when I saw a pizza on TV the other day. So this is gonna take some hard work. (Angela immediately shouted “NOOOOO!” after my “ooh” outburst. Thank you.)

As of right now, the only carbs I had this week were from a bowl of ice cream. But that’s it. I’ve only been drinking water, and coffee. Now, according to this diet, I’m not supposed to drink coffee. Well, that guy that wrote the book on the diet didn’t take into effect a repititious job, and the 3 o’clock desire for a nap. So the coffee stays. I’m starting this diet, honestly, weighing in around 4+ bills. I know, I know, how did I get this big? Let me tell you, 8 years of what I call “stoner couch syndrome.” It’s pretty self explanatory. I’m going to try to get a picture of me now, and add it to this blog. I’ll do this weekly, and see if there’s any progress. If there’s no progress, the last photo you’ll see of me will involve a noose, and a broken horizontal beam in someones basement.

That’s it for now, updates to come.